Where Going?

Our guide warned us the minute we began picking our way among the rubble on the ancient isle of Delos: we could Look Where We were GOING or we could Look Where We WERE, lest we stumble - ‘bite the dust,’ as Homer said to describe what happens in battle. (Picture it: crying out in anguish as the solider falls and sees his mouth suddenly stuffed full with the muck undefoot.)For the hour I spent in Delos's museum I did only the Look Where You ARE Thing, living fully in the present as I gazed at this statue and the curve of its supple back. Like most moderns I spend much of my time Looking Where I'm GOING Thing, thinking “What next?” and “After that?” and “If the rain falls?”, “If I miss the train?” If I lose my job?”If I’m honest though I’ll admit I spend most of my time Looking Back. Where is my mother who I think of every day, even these 22 years after her death? Where are the kitchens of my childhood, my baby feet in my naps as I so clearly remember seeing them? Where are they now? Where is this young person caught in stone? This couple of the exquisite garments? Where ? Where ?