That Cottage of Darkness

Here below  is my favorite Mary Oliver poem, When Death Comes. Death came 36 hours ago for my Uncle Ed, and it came in just that way, the dagger of ice plunged between the shoulder blades.

I found his body and I got to be near it for a long time: through the EMT's to the police, to the firefighters who had to take  the hinges off the bathroom door to get him out because he fell against it, wedging it shut. Ed was a big man.

When they did finally get him out, his arms were up - frozen up because he had died some 12 or 15 hours before - and it just struck me, that position. He looked like he was reaching out to embrace some dear long-awaited friend.

That's the image I will take with me over the next days. It reminded me of this poem. Mary Oliver says Let me live my life like the bride married to amazement, Like the bridegroom taking the world in his arms.

Read on...

When Death Comes

When death comes like the hungry bear in autumn;

When death comes and takes all the bright coins from his purse to buy me, and snaps the purse shut;

When death comes like the measle-pox;

When death comes like an iceberg between the shoulder blades,

I want to step through the door full of curiosity, wondering: what is it going to be like, that cottage of darkness?

And therefore I look upon everything

As a brotherhood and a sisterhood,

And I look upon time as no more than an idea,

And I consider eternity as another possibility,

And I think of each life as a flower, as common

As a field daisy, and as singular,

And each name a comfortable music in the mouth,

Tending, as all music does, toward silence,

And each body a lion of courage, and something

Precious to the earth.

When it’s over I want to say: all my life

I was a bride married to amazement,

I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

 When it’s over, I don’t want to wonder

If I have made of my life something particular and real.

I don’t want to find myself sighing

And frightened,  or full of argument.

I don’t want to end up simply having visited this world.

 

And When I Die

Let’s talk more about death but let’s be cheerful about it: Do you know that poem by Mary Oliver When Death Comes? I loved it so much when I first saw it that I typed it up and  framed it: For the last 15 years it has hung in our downstairs bathroom, right at eye level  over the toilet so that most of  our male visitors know it by heart. One does anyway. You could go up to this young guy while he was skiing down a mountain in the middle of blizzard and say recite "When Death Comes" and bam! he'd do it for you. Perfectly. At lightning speed. (Ah Youth!)I used to know it by heart. Now I can get through only the first few lines alas, the rest having gotten tumbled around with all the other things I know by heart like "Stopping by Woods on A Snowy Evening" and "Jabberwocky" and the Preamble to the Constitution. Thanks to the minor deities Cut and Paste though, I can give it to you now:

When death comeslike the hungry bear in autumnwhen death comes and takes all the bright coins from his purseto buy me, and snaps his purse shut;when death comeslike the measle-pox;when death comeslike an iceberg between the shoulder blades,I want to step through the door full of curiosity, wondering;what is it going to be like, that cottage of darkness?And therefore I look upon everythingas a brotherhood and a sisterhood,and I look upon time as no more than an idea,and I consider eternity as another possibility,and I think of each life as a flower, as commonas a field daisy, and as singular,and each name a comfortable music in the mouthtending as all music does, toward silence,and each body a lion of courage, and somethingprecious to the earth.When it's over, I want to say: all my lifeI was a bride married to amazement.I was a bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.When it's over, I don't want to wonderif I have made of my life something particular, and real.I don't want to find myself sighing and frightenedor full of argument.I don't want to end up simply having visited this world.

Pretty nice eh? And here's another nice one, a song Laura Nyro wrote that Peter Paul & Mary covered in the 60s before Blood Sweat & Tears got their hands on it. A great tune with a great message, whoever's doing the singing.[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_R02Mm_J_s]