Dressed in Borrowed Robes

Day 3 on board the Fun Ship Inspiration with big Sister Nan, pictured, and Cousin Sheila whose landmark birthday we’re celebrating with this Cruise to No Place Much. Day 3 with just the clothes I wore on board, the rest of my stuff orbiting someplace between Tampa and the Eden isle of Cozumel.But Nan gave me a pair of sandals and Sheil lent me a nice fluttery thing for the big Captain’s Dinner. Other than that I’m wearing a couple of bought-on-board short-and-T-shirt combos, all imprinted with either Carnival Cruise Line’s logo or the kinds of sayings that appeal to smart-alecky 12-year-olds. (I am like TEN TIMES OLDER THAN THAT in case anybody thought I was first cousin and contemporary to  the blogger Heather Armstrong and don’t I wish, just for that jawline alone.) This on a ship with females who at every hour of the day and night look like total underwear models while I myself have no makeup, no meds, no hairbrush, no extra bras except a somewhat decorative but not altogether functional strapless number and… no underpants. I do however have a quart dispenser of liquid body soap attached to the wall of my shower, two or three ounces of which I squirt into a drinking glass. This I mix in the sink with hot-hot, sudsy-sudsy water, wash those faithful little bikini undies, wring ‘em out and what else? pop ‘em back on wet and go up to the pool deck to let the sun take care of the Dry Cycle. What else can I do really? I’m sure not about to walk around without underwear and did I mention I don’t have a bathing suit?Turns out I don’t care, really, and that’s the good part. I got the hot sun and a world of food; got “Soothing Tunes by Rick,” by day and “Relaxing Piano Music by Hrvoje” at teatime, and - can it get any better? - “Karaoke Kraziness with Sanjay” by night. Here’s Sheila on the left with me - the three of us just keep on drinking smiling!