Ya Got a Little Something
Humbling: I gave a talk yesterday at a library luncheon which I knew was the real draw for the folks who came; I was just the after-dinner mints, just that anonymous somebody there to offer the entertainment. Nobody really knew me in other words, which turned out to be a very good thing since it meant I could scoot quickly past the toothsome wraps and salads, slide right by the acre of sheet cake on my way to the lectern. I got there fast enough so that the kind woman who came up to me did so before any one else could notice:“Hiiii! Terry, right? Listen if this were me I’d want to know so let me just tell you: you’re not zipped.”I looked down at the front of my pants. Sure enough!Then after my talk, which involved many merry tales, the occasional wiping of eyes and a short pause when I forgot what I was saying in the middle of a story - another kind soul approached me.“I know you weren’t aware of this but you have frosting all over the front of your suit."I looked down again. Yup. Frosting from that giant sheet cake. It was like the time I stood on a stage looking down at an audience of 800, croaked out an opening sentence, reached for the glass of water thoughtfully provided – and poured it right down the front of my dress.It’s a hard thing when as a speaker you falter or simply stops dead in a fugue state of confusion, since the last thing you want an audience to have to do is worry about you. While I don’t think anyone worried about me exactly at least a few of them sure pitied me.And I guess I’m OK with that. I used to worry so about people’s opinion of me and practically apologized to my blind dates for not being better looking. Self-consciousness ruled my world then.I‘m happy to say I am through with all that now. I’ll bet I make a dozen mistakes a day and find it not SO bad to be the recipient of people’s pity.Pity’s OK. There are days when I pity practically everyone I see, from the cold and lonely stars above to that little ant I watched on my windowsill, dragging his dead comrade home for burial.
