Eating Like Animals

“So is your husband still eating like a farm animal?” This was my sister Nan last week referring to the strange fact that David now eats only standing up. He’s reverting to his childhood I think, to the days when he wolfed his food before running off to the night game or the practice or the meeting of the class officers or whatever.But it’s  just the two of us here now so what can I say? He also sometimes cooks - sort of , if it counts as cooking when you take every leftover in the fridge and fry it in soy sauce. Mostly I cook but then he cleans, as you can see here.Nan’s a character all right. When I was visiting her last week in Florida she came into the kitchen one morning in a T-shirt that said “My Fantasy: To Have TWO Men” and, on the following line, “One Cooking, One Cleaning.”Yet Chuck grills better than anyone I know and he wipes down the entire bathroom sink area every time he finishes using it. I mean she HAS  her fantasy man, right?But it isn’t really about Chuck anyway; it’s more about Nan. This tough guy routine is just her outward pose is all; I’m onto her. That day she came into the kitchen she found me was chopping onions with a knife she’d been praising the night before. “Ah the new knife!” she said. “Yeah Chuck ordered that a few weeks ago. He’s buying stuff online now. I have to watch him like a hawk.”"But it’s a great knife! You said it yourself.”“Yeah it’s a great knife but what’s next? I come home and there’s a pipe organ in the living room?”You have to know her. Reading this you might get the impression that she’s as tough as nails. Nah. Chuck does what he likes and so does she. If there’s a better way to grow old together I sure don’t know it.

Old Dave and Me: Together Since Before There Was Faxing